05 March 2012

Abrasive

I have been struggling with the fact that my demeanor comes off as abrasive, mean, uncompassionate. To be completely honest, I find it hard to make new friends.  I've heard that people who don't know me find me hard to approach and cold. Ouch!
In 2012, I am trying to make an effort to be more approachable, less abrasive, and warm. I'm trying to be the first one to say hi, to initiate a truly meaningful conversation, to show people that I actually care about them and their feelings/life.

This has been hard for me. I'm usually the wallflower that waits to be introduced or invited. I suppose the root of my personality flaw is the fear of rejection. What if the person(s) I try to talk to don't like me? What if they are secretly hoping that I don't come up an join in or start a conversation? What if I speak and they choose not to? This is all new terrain to me... and it scares me.

So here goes nothing! To a new, friendlier, more compassionate Carla!

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