Oh, Baby!!

On Wednesday, February 29th, Jason and I proudly announced the pending arrival of our Little Nugget! We made the announcement via Facebook. The wording was of such:

"Jason and I will have another mouth to feed and heart to love come time October!
We're Expecting!!! Please pray that we'll continue to have a non-eventful, happy and healthy pregnancy! ♥"

8w6d

Estimated Due Date: sometime between September 30 and October 02, 2012

I've always known that I wanted to have children some day. This reality is not always a given as I have come to understand over the years. Jason and I are blessed to have gotten our tiny little miracle so easily, but for others, the journey can be long, challenging, disappointing and/or rewarding.

The pregnancy reality has finally become real for me. I've seen bouncing "Little Nugget" twice on ultrasound and am nearing my second trimester. What's even more exciting is that I will get to see my little miracle again this coming Monday for the genetic screening ultrasound.

This past Monday (3/12), Little Nugget gave me a little scare. I woke up and went to the bathroom as usual and noticed some bright red spotting. I had been cramping all weekend- so the combination of the two had me worried and concerned about the possibility of miscarriage. I called my obstetrician's office and was instructed to park it on the couch and drink lots of water. I was also told to call back after 48 hours if my symptoms got worse or hadn't stop. Welcome Wednesday... I woke up, went to the bathroom, and had another unwelcomed surprise. I called the doctor's office again and was told to come in. Once there, they didn't waste any time bringing in the portable ultrasound machine. The doctor was able to squirt some gel on my stomach and quickly find Little Nugget. What a beautiful sight! A visible heartbeat and movement... lots of it!!! (S)He was moving around so much that I wasn't sure that we'd get a good picture out of the scan, but we did. The doctor also performed an internal exam on me and stated that everything looked great. The spotting and cramping could be due to my uterus expanding for the first time- nothing to worry about. :)  Such a great appointment! I hadn't expected to get an ultrasound out of the deal- at best, maybe a Doppler reading of the heartbeat.
I'll have to post a picture of Little Nugget's visit soon. They didn't give me a digital copy this time. Just one flimsy, but good, hardcopy of the scan.

So until then...
♥

Abrasive

I have been struggling with the fact that my demeanor comes off as abrasive, mean, uncompassionate. To be completely honest, I find it hard to make new friends.  I've heard that people who don't know me find me hard to approach and cold. Ouch!
In 2012, I am trying to make an effort to be more approachable, less abrasive, and warm. I'm trying to be the first one to say hi, to initiate a truly meaningful conversation, to show people that I actually care about them and their feelings/life.

This has been hard for me. I'm usually the wallflower that waits to be introduced or invited. I suppose the root of my personality flaw is the fear of rejection. What if the person(s) I try to talk to don't like me? What if they are secretly hoping that I don't come up an join in or start a conversation? What if I speak and they choose not to? This is all new terrain to me... and it scares me.

So here goes nothing! To a new, friendlier, more compassionate Carla!